Fact: Feelings affects habits. Are you aware how your feelings affect habits that you have? Many of the feelings we have, particularly in our formative years, can deeply impact the choices we make. If you grew up in a family that struggled with poverty, it can affect you in several ways. You may find yourself limiting your goals because you’ve always been told you can’t expect more. You may spend money rapidly because you’re making up for lost time. If you grew up in a household with divorce, you may have a fear of commitment. Alternatively, you may value the bond of marriage that much more.
How Feelings Affect Habits
When we experience life, we have thoughts about what is happening. We think about what our five senses tell us. We think about how that makes us feel. Then we feel what we think we “should” feel. If we feel that way long enough, those thoughts and feeling form a belief. And those beliefs will affect which habits we create.
What Are Habits?
Because habits are simply sets of steps we do repeatedly, negative thoughts, feeling and beliefs can affect them. This can lead to underachievement, over achievement or self sabotage. If you have a bad feeling about an experience, it can have your feelings affect habits you develop in a negative way.
This is why, when we’re talking about habits, some of the first things I encourage you to challenge deal with your sense of self-confidence. Just how secure are you? And if you deal with insecurity, it’s best to make your first steps, those that deal directly with that issue.
Spreading Your Wings
We all day dream, and so the first step is, to allow yourself to dream without limits. It often helps if you think of this in the context of, if I were someone else, or had a different life. That immediately takes the baggage out of the equation and allows you to spread your wings completely.
So with that in mind, if there were no limits, what is it you want out of life?
Perhaps you want to own your first home. Maybe you just want to have a happy marriage. Or you might want to get a particular college degree. Allow yourself to really feel what it would be like to accomplish these things. Ultimately, while we can’t control everything that happens in our lives, we can control what we feel about it. Feelings are a choice.
Whatever your goal is, write it down. Don’t be critical of yourself, or of your goals. Then, instead of saying things like, “I can’t afford it,” ask yourself, “How can I afford it?” This is an exercise of living in the solution rather than the problem.
For anything you may want to have, or do in your life, now take your best guess at the steps you’ll need to achieve it. Then, write yourself a few affirmations that affirm you having it. Next, look at the steps you’ve laid out, and figure out which steps will need to be repeated. These are the habits you’ll need to develop.
As you start doing these things repeatedly, they will eventually become a part of your daily routine.